"He made the storm be still, and the waves of the
sea were hushed.
Then they were glad that the waters
were quiet, and He brought them to their desired haven."
Psalm 107:29-30
Sunday, May 16, 2010
I am a hypochondriac
Okay so maybe I'm not but I've been researching this naprotechnology thing and I found a couple things that sound like me. First of all I've never had a lap or HSG and never thought I would. The RE gave me an all clear so I assumed I'm not contributing to our IF. Now I think I might be. For one thing I think it is completely irresponsible of my RE not to do an HSG. Because of our male factor he's always been selling us IVF so of course it wouldn't matter if my tubes are open. But since my bloodwork has always come back normal he's never looked too deeply into my side of things. But I think I have endo. Ever since I was in high school deep in the back of my mind I've wondered. But I assumed my symptoms were just normal AF. But now after posting on a message board and talking to other girls with endo, I'm feeling pretty sure I have at least some mild endo. And that would make sense if I didn't have "perfect" reproductive organs because DH's numbers aren't always that bad, in fact they are almost normal during the winter months. So I was asking myself, why in almost 4 years have we not once gotten pg on our own? Seems even serious male factor people get lucky eventually. I told myself maybe it was because of DH's 0% morph, or maybe it just wasn't God's plan. Now I know it isn't his morph because this other lab said he was normal. Although I can't rule out the maybe it isn't God's plan theory, maybe I do have some issues. So I think I'm going to talk to an ob/gyn at another clinic and see what she says about me having endo and possibly doing a lap. I have to switch clinics or anyone I talk to will just refer me back to the RE. I'm feeling positive about this, I think I do need a lap to remove some endo. I don't know why I didn't consider this sooner. Its expensive and insurance will cover it but first I need to meet my 3k deductible. So because we have 4th quarter carry over, my plan is to see a new ob/gyn within the next month and if she thinks its warranted, schedule a lap for October. Then regardless of how that turns out, we can pursue treatments again, DH's numbers will start going up and my deductible will be met making treatments and meds cheaper (not totally paid for but cheaper). I do think at some point we need to say enough is enough and stop spending money on trying to get pregnant. But I think this lap is important for me to do for general health reasons, not just fertility reasons. And I'm serious about my goal to lose weight this summer. I'm the kind of person that always needs to have a plan, so here's my plan, I feel much better now. Eat healthy and lose weight this summer, lap in October, possible TTCN or treatments in Dec. Jan. & Feb. If we're still unsuccessful by March then it will be time to get a new plan.
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