He's Home!!

Sweet little J was born July 20th at 8:28 pm and weighed 7 lbs 0 oz, 20.5 in.  He is perfect in every way.  Since he came via emergency c-section we weren't discharged from the hospital until Monday night.  Since it was late and we have a 4 hour drive we stayed at a hotel with the birthparents.  They signed papers early Tuesday morning and we spent the rest of the day with them, giving them plenty of time to say goodbye.  I cried all the way home, I expected to be happier but it broke my heart to leave without them.  We got so close over the weekend they feel like family.  I even cried when I said goodbye to birth grandma.  They are our family now and we love them.  I can not believe how incredibly strong bmom is.  The whole thing could not have gone better except the sadness of saying goodbye.  We talked about both sides of the adoption process and it was cool to hear their side of the story and how and when they picked us and how they were feeling after our meetings.  We were so open and comfortable with them.  I was never worried they wouldn't sign.  At one point I was worried they would and I would be responsible for this sweet little person.  (I still feel that way when I think about being his mommy for life, its overwhelming!)   We bonded over how much we all dislike the social worker.  I know she's doing her job but she just made things more uncomfortable.  Thankfully she is a busy lady and left Saturday morning, not to return until Monday  night so we had the weekend to bond without her overbearing presence.  We've been texting and I know bmom is sad but says she'll be okay.  We have plans to meet again in 3 weeks but if she has a really hard time, I will suggest we meet somewhere half way sooner.  There is so much I want to share but at the same time it was so special, I just want to keep it close to my heart and not share it.  I will decide what to share more in future posts. 

I wish I could post pictures so you all could see how cute J is but we can't put pictures online until finalization.  So far he is a perfect baby and I'm still wondering when the hard part starts.  He sleeps for 4-5 hours between feedings and when he's awake he doesn't fuss.  Last night DH fed him before he went to bed at 11, I fed and changed him at 2:30 and was back in bed within 15 min.  Then we got up for the day and fed him again at 6am.  This morning he was awake for over an hour, just looking around and listening to me and his great grandma.  I had planned on putting him on Enfamil but the hospital used Similac Sensitive and he is doing so well on it that I better keep him on it.  No tummy aches or spit up so far.  He is my little angel specially delivered straight from heaven.  I still cry whenever I think of his bmom and what a huge gift she gave us.