Saturday, October 9, 2010
Some Days I'm Stupid
I just don't know why sometimes I do things that I know I shouldn't. Today is one of those days. I just can't wait to go to bed and wake up tomorrow so that I can start over. I've had a bad cold this week so while I've stuck to my calorie range and gotten the minimum 30 minutes a day of exercise this week, I've felt lousy. I decided today was a free day, a day where I wouldn't count calories or exercise. A day to rest and feel better. Well I feel worse and here's why....I made a lot of dumb choices today. Puppy chow and a glass a milk for breakfast? Dumb choice #1. Mindlessly surfing the net for 2 hours after work this morning - dumb choice #2. Eating a huge plate of nachos left over from taco night a few days ago - #3. Afternoon nap followed by 1.5 hours of TV- that's #4. At this point its about 3pm and I was feeling like garbage and like I wasted the day away so I went out to the farm to take care of my chickens and then took the dog for a short walk. I harvested my 8 pumpkins and pulled up the dead vines. Finally I accomplished something. I came back inside, ate a piece of left over cake from my parents anniversary this week and went back to mindlessly surfing the web. I visited the nest/bump. I haven't been there in almost a year, ever since all my infertile friends moved on to endless IVF treatments and eventually all got pregnant. This is huge mistake #5. Sure it was nice to see they all had toddlers by now but it was just a painful reminder that they moved on and I didn't. And worse yet, my baby is suppose to be 1 year old this month. Hello pity party! I knew it would make me sad to visit all my old buddies on the nest but I did it anyway. I knew eating garbage food and being lazy today would make me feel terrible but I did it anyway. WHY?! Why must I do things I know will not make me feel good and will not make me happy. I totally need to make better decisions. *sigh* I feel bloated and PMSy but AF is still a whole week away. Oh well, tomorrow I will wake up and make it a better day.