Thursday, February 3, 2011
Death is so hard to understand. I feel somewhat more peace about people deaths because I know that Jesus is waiting to take them to heaven where I'll see them again someday. But dogs are different. Dust into dust and that's it. I don't believe in animal heaven since animals don't have souls in the spiritual sense. But God did definitely create animals with amazing abilities and personalities that many people seem to lack. Dog is man's best friend for a reason. Saying goodbye to Katie and understanding why this happened is so hard. Last weekend after crying all day and praying for a miracle she actually started doing better. In fact Tuesday night we went to see her and took Missy along. She didn't look good but they said she was starting to eat and recovering slowly but right on track for her situation. But then her internal organs started to fail and last night my parents put her to sleep. We went to say goodbye this morning and we'll bury her when the ground thaws enough. It almost seems it would be easier to understand if she had been sick or ran over. But to die because she ate strange things and we can't understand why. And why did God make her better for a few days and give us hope just to have her die anyway? I'm not really trying to understand it because if there is anything infertility has taught me its that "why?" is a stupid question that hardly ever has an answer. I know some people may think well it was just a dog, get over it already. But Katie was so much a part of our family and our life for the past 8 years that it just seems like nothing we do will be the same without her.